I crapped myself

We all got embarrassing stories as kids....so I'm going to tell you one of mines.



It was 1995, Montgomery Alabama Vaughn rd elementary school (Ms. Gambles class room 101)....yeah I took yall back to the old school lol. Any way it was friday show and tell so you know it was jumpin in that bitch...you know I was in that thang flexing with the Franky Frankenstein toy...yall know the one that talked and you could open up his head and chest....yeah buuurrrrrrrr.....so a nigga had that best toy and shit....so after the victory of show and tell it was nap time.....


The wake up.....

So I wake up from my nap and shit and I'm thinking damn I must have put on a few pounds because I felt heavy than usual. So I stand up and ummm that's when I felt something drop in my draws.....my reaction is like god nooooooooooooooooooooooo don't let this be me....did i really shit on my self......fuck (yes I cursed like a mothafucka when I was young also) so I run to the bathroom pull down my pants and man it looked like a cow pasture down there no lie....I would've went commando and disposed of the draws but I'm not a fan of shit and besides that would leave evidence....so I go back in the class room...its 2:30 the bell don't ring till 3 so I'm just sitting here in my own shit like a dead old person who shitted themselves in the middle of dying. this whole time I'm hearing people say "man what is that smell"..."something stink" you know its like you get super hearing powers when something embarrassing happens to you...you can hear everybody saying shit...during this whole time period I'm praying nobody finds out..hell I think I cursed god out for letting this happen to me lol. So the 3o minutes that felt like a whole new day pass the bell ring I get up run for the bus with cow fertilizer in my draws.


The bus ride.....


Now if yall know anything about the deep south...then yall know in april its hot as fuck, and that did'nt help my situation or the person sitting next to me who just so happen to be my friend (brian..bucktooth country kid with big ears who stayed up the street from me) this littel loud ass bumpkin just blurt out"yall smell that something STANKKKKKK!!!!" this nigga is loud as fuck real talk "Bus driver you smell that" so you know I'm pissed but I gotta play it off like it aint me...so I'm like "Hell yeah something stank damn let down the windows" (OMG lol at this as I'm typing) man I had the whole bus fucked up....finally I get home


Home....

So I run in the house tell me my mom what happened she throws away my chemical ass polluted clothes and tell me to get in the tub.....after all this is done, she says"You know if you would've told the teacher about this I could have came and got you from school" I'm like (0______0).....It never dawn on me to call my mom...thats what I get for panicking. I swear for a week my brother and sisters talked about me shitting on myself lmfao....



"DONT JUDGE ME DAMMNIT"