Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Black Ops and Bitches

Listen man..Me and my patna Chi town Al (he's in the 5 piece story also) use to be out here...wild ass night with bitches, I mean every damn night nigga..Black bitches, Yellow Bitches, Brown bitches, Red bitches.... didn't even matter...we had them..but yeah I slowed down because shit I was starting summer school. I couldn't be up all night fuckin with the ratchets. So this one Thursday I get home around 7pm...nigga.....I had to study...nigga...I was tired...nigga...I wanted to play black ops...nigga..but yall dont hear me tho. This fool call me..conversation go like this...wait before I get into the conversation, know this. I answer the phone angry with a dry voice when every one call me..I don't give a damn, I don't like talking...on with the conversation.

Al: G

Me: Nigga what

Al: Aye don't talk to me like that joe

Me: Nigga fuck you...this my damn phone

Al: Yeah I bet if I beat yo damn ass...it'll be my phone

Me; Man what you want shit cuz ain bout to play these fucking games

Al: I got a new hoe...Me and Mon bout to bring her through the crib...break her ass in

Me: ok...Lol..fuck that got to do with me

Al: Cuz we all bout to fuck her nigga

Me: Ain doing shit, I'm bout to study and play this damn back ops

Al: yeah aight we'll see...I'm on the way

Me: whatever

Funny how I can remember detailed conversations like that but barely can remember people names...


Mon

This fool arrive with Mon dumb old ass...I swear this nigga had to be like 33.. Cali ass nigga..this nigga use to rock braids with beads in his fucking head dawg, them shit aint have no hang time..nigga use to put like 3 beads on each braid..the last bead would be hanging above his earlobe...Me and this fool Al wasnt shit but 21 and 24..I remember this old ass nigga Mon said " I can't sleep alone Cuz" bruh lmaooooo me an Al clowned the shit outta this nigga...fuck you mean you cant sleep alone...you ol soap opera ass nigga...you a sound like a mothafuckin bitch. Fuck this nigga was talking about man

So yeah they come in..I'm playing black ops..I don't pay them any mind..Al come in my room and is like " We bout to train this bitch", I'm like naw YALL bout to train that bitch..nigga im tired and I'm playing this game...this nigga Al, "Nigga you sound Bitch made right now"...I say whatever..go back to playing the game..nigga was making me angry...he gets up and leave and go back into the living room..I hear him talking "Bitch take them clothes, lets get this shit crackin..and shake that ass some"...I hear her say " Aight Fame..its whatever"...I cut my tv down to mute bruh...look..I'm a creep...I wanted to hear some shit lmao..................................................Like that broad moaning and shit

The Action

This nigga put on Gucci mane "Im a dog" LOL...I just hear them loud mafuckas yelling "ayeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee"...My curiosity got the best of me...I get up and go in the damn living room...this red ass bitch is on the sofa just shaking her ass dawg....NAKID...now my first thought is...we sit on this sofa everyday and this fool got this hoe poppin pussy on the sofa arm rest..ON THE FUCKING ARM REST BRUH....Ignore it....so then she just start playing with herself....I'm like "aye..tell this bitch to get on the floor bruh" I dont want my mama coming to visit and the entire sofa smell like ovaries and cervix juice ...he tell her and she do it...still playing with herself..bent OVER...in DOGGYSTYLE....I dont know what came over me but I had the urge to smack her ass...it was a big ass bruh...I had to do it for eastpoint and the entire zone 3...

The ass smack

I remember this scene from National Security where Martin smacks this bitch ass with Two hands and yell...IS THIS A THONG...look man I'm notorious for acting out shit in movies and videos...I smack the hell outta them Yellow booty butt cheeks and yell...WHAT IS THIS...WHAT IS IN THIS ASS..I just started rubbing her butt in a circle motion..SLAPPIN DAT ass up ...this fool Al is dying laughing...but wait there's more

Budlight fountain
So we go get the beer out the fridge..this guy Al...wild guy....he pours the entire can of beer down her ass crack......we just started pouring beer all down her butt crack bruh...beer dripping down her crack..on some stone cold steve austin type shit...turned that pussy into a damn keg

Byt this time I'm like aight I done had my fun..I got back to my room and play the game...10 minutes later Al come to my room and sit down and say "G...Mon is in the living room making love to this hoe", I'm like nigga you lying..."g on the boss he in there right now...making love...he aint fucking her..he in there making love" I started laughing my ass off man..I get up and go in the living room....and here is Mon and this bitch in the middle of my floor making love....this nigga making love to a fucking whore...in the middle of my living room floor...I go back in the room...I'm like yeahhhhhh..that nigga in there making love to her like its his honey moon...I play like 5 games of team death match...thats almost 50 minutes when you do the math...this bitch is yelling like a fucking rooster....I get up and go to the living room like..aye...nigga its been like a damn hour...get this bitch up outta here..fuck you think you is..spokes person for Viagra ??? yall got this mothafucka smelling like ass and salvation army..yall gotta leave.


Only thing I regret from the night is not sliding my student id card down that broad ass crack...still on my bucket list...

and if you wondering about the sofa and carpet after the beer fest...I moved to another apartment, left that shit.





Tuesday, January 10, 2012

The Train Volume 1

So this is something new I'm doing for my blog...Atl by far got the craziest people in the world that rides the train...no lie something crazy is always going on...so I ot my lil photography going on now...and well lets fucking get it to it shit!





Look what we have here people...WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT ON HERE HEAD!!!!!!

Shawty I just dont know...this bitch went and got a pitch fork and covered it in a 2 dollar yaki.....what is this !!!??? The sears tower of lacefronts ??? OMG OMG look at the sides bruh....I know right...WHAT SIDES!!?? Man this bitch rocking a bald fade pone tail...aint never seen a bowl cut mixed with an up do...Oh ok, I see what happened to shawty sides...while she was struggling to put that Haitian refugee weave in a pony tail..her sides disintegrated..leaving her with 3rd degree welfare burns....Bitch looking like Blade after he missed a few barbershop trips..Billy Blanks with a matted up durag looking ass bitch...I bet this bitch hair smell like foodstamps, and W2 tax returns...I know it do got dammit

Fuck it let me get her ass out of here

Bitch head lookin like a dirty shank
Bitch head lookin like a rusty kitchen knife set
Bitch head look like the Eiffel Tower covered in walrus booboo
Bitch head look like a used rooster uterus
Bitch head looking like she use commode seat crud for weave glue
Bitch head looking like a flat head screw driver
Bitch head look like a muddy weed wacker


Bitch sides looking like an African kids stomach.....empty
Bitch sides is vacant
Bitch sides was plagued with an STD... S.ideless T.o D.eath
Bitch sides look like a naked welcome mat
Bitch sides so lil, she get her split ends cut with a toe nail clipper
Bitch gotta use Wd40 and motor oil just to grease that nappy ass scalp
bitch sold her sides for a nickel bag of pickle juice


Bitch hair so nappy she comb that shit with a stapler gun
Bitch Scalp so bald she use paper clips to hold her weave shank at the top of her head
Bitch hair so nappy her eyes turn blood shot red every time she combs it
Bitch hair so nappy kittens use that shit as scratching post
Bitch hair so nappy she get her edges laid down with gorilla glue


Man my dick so flaccid right now bruh looking at this woman...I'm out... enjoy...more to come


Sunday, January 1, 2012

THE GET YOUR ASS OUT OF HERE LIST

Now listen..yall know I dont have the best of luck with women...reason why ? I DONT FUCKING KNOW...if I knew...my lonely ass would have a GF by now and she would last more than a GOT DAMN YEAR!!!! but yeah back on subject...let me break this down to yall about me...women!

What I Want!

Yall call me picky, stuck up, shallow or whatever the holy hell you birds want to...but listen..I dont talk to ugly dusty feet looking scabs..straight up I refuse to be that one bum nigga in the mall trailing behind that Raspushia costume wearing bitch...naw not even hoe...yall aint trapping me! a young PimpAsaures like me need something fine, something soft, something with a big ass and lickable (yeah I know that aint a word..so fuck you) thighs got dammit..and if that aint clear enough for ya...well I made a list for you hoes..here it go!

The List

1. If you got 800 smiling faces in your thighs from all them thigh dimples...bitch..your ass is out of here..I weigh 155 and peaking at 6 feet....bitch I have no business with you and all 20 of your love handles.what uma do with 40 asses and 20 titties ??? Look if we in the shower and I gotta wash back titties...YOU GOTTA GET YOUR ASS OUT OF HERE

2. If you look like ya pussy stank...bitch..YOUR TART ASS IS OUT OF HERE.and let me tell you..ain never been wrong about a bitch pussy smelling like public transportation and section 8 housing...you got me all fucked up...you think I'm bout to eat your kitty litter..HA!!!!!!...what you thought you could put some Ax spray down there and I wouldnt smell it...naw...and I bet you have on leggings...out here smelling like goodwill and crackhouse

3. I can smell your hot ass douche bag breath after you tried to shield it behind bubble gum lip gloss...your ass is out of here...fuck you think I like to smell bubblelicious and ass...fuck no...stank breath skank..a nigga will kiss you and taste vomit flavored fruit roll ups...if ya breath stank ya pussy stank...and you know YOUR ASS IS OUT OF HERE..breath tasting like fruit snacks and poverty

4. You got that one crusty ass pinky toe with the toe nail looking like run down cheap carpet...your dusty feet ass is out of here...bitch got a frosted flake on her toe nail tolmbout fresh Pedicure...bitch plahhhhhseeeeeeeeee...bitches be getting pedicures by a plummer these days....toes all dingy and black looking like you house roaches inside them...YEAH YOUR ASS OUT OF HERE

5. If your pony tail is the size of a tshirt tag....YOUR ASS IS OUT OF HERE..bitch you might as well get a durag, brush, and some sports waves grease..bald head ass...hoe pone tail looking like rabbit foot key chain...bitch you aint bringing no good luck to me look like a recovering cancer patient...bitch dont even use rubber bands....she use that wrapper that comes on a loaf of bread lmaoooooooooooooooo....shawty be so bald headed the first time she tried to put that thin ass hair in a pone tail she had to get stitches on her hairline....shawty hair so damn lil and poor when she get it in a pone tail her face cant move...bitch be having a botox effect...If ya eyebrows came off because you had to force that lil ass hair in a pone tail...YOUR ASS IS OUT OF HERE

6. If you got a huge gap in your mouth (now look I know I gotta gap...but um sexy so fuck up) bitch your ass is out of here...I dont play that spatula mouth shit AKA gapula...if I you can suck my dick through your gap...hoe we aint compatible...mondo gap looking scab..ol got damn behind my lips its a secret door called a GAP looking ass bitch...bitch dont eem open here mouth to breath bruh...she sucking air in through her gap.. Michael Strahan looking hoe

7. No ass=your pussy stank and you gotta getcho ass up out of here...what I look like using your bare back ass as a foot stool...bitch ass be so flat she need handle bars to hold her underwear up...bitch ass so flat her thongs got handicap stickers in them...bitch ass be so flat niggas buy her tall tees because they consider her ass apart of her back...bitch ass so flat niggas was boogy boarding on it during the freaknik 98...bitch ass so flat when she sit down on the sofa she slides on the floor..bitch ass so flat nigga gotta put on 3d glasses when he hit from the back..Ass like these new bag of potato chips....all air and half empty...flat screen booty having scab...is LCD or LED...which one ? bitch I need HDMI cables to even see that ass

8. If you built like a jar of playdough...BITCH YOUR ASS IS OUT OF HERE...who you think I am...fucking Picasso ? I cant fix you..no way in hell...looking like the fucking blob...if your stomach spilling over your belt...aye...getcho ass out of here bitch stomach spilling over like a cup filled to the brim...muffin top ass how your body look like a mushroom...bitch torso look like an open umbrella..ain got time...

9. You got nappy ass hair....Your ass is out of here...if you can cause a drive by shooting by combing your hair..bitch you need to be dead...dont try to cover it up with one of those citi trends lace front...I have no time to look at your zip on hairline..hairline looking like a starter jacket...bitch hair look like a freshly opened shamwow...Shawty try to wash her hair and end up with a million paper cuts on her hands...blood running down her face and shit

10. no hoodrats


That basically sums it up...so if you fall in any of those numbers on this list...well YOUR ASS IS OUT OF HERE..and I dont care about any of yall being mad at my list either...cause yall ugly..and um aint


P.S. GOD PLEASE SEND ME A YOUNG HOT THANG FA DA 2012...even Keef get lonely...if you dont...you know where um at nigga..plotting on yo ass and the Virgin Mary with Lucifer..we will run a train on her nigga if you dont answer my prayers...Pleigh...





HAPPY NEW YEAR TO MY READERS...AND RIP TO MY AUNT....WE'RE GOING TO MISS YOU DOWN HERE..THESE FEW WEEKS BEEN ROUGH ON MY FATHER AND ME..TAKE CARE

Friday, November 25, 2011

That Awkward Moment of Silence

Ok yall....here we go..lets get something out of the way! Now for those of you that's been here from the jump...since the got damn beginning..KNOW!!!! When I post a blog about my sex life...the shit never goes smooth...welllllllllll of course I'm back with a new story, well its not new shit happened back in 2009 but still this my first time telling it so shut the fuck up bitch and listen...OH what ? You not gone listen ? Well fuck you and ya stank ass mama..bih be coming outside with that lil ass pone tail at the top of her head cause sheen got enough hair in the back to reach the front...hoe head looking like a broken convertible top...bih done gelled the back of her hair all night looking like bo slick and Harriet Tubman...back of the hoe head ashy hard and crusty, like Nigerian feet...bitch I know you...you the lil long fruit roll up titty having hoe that was trying to be candy lady for a day and ended up giving away all ya candy for nickel bags of crack scrapings....

WOAHHHHHHHH!!!!!! I see i got distracted lol...back to the story

The Web

So yeah, I had just got back to Atlanta and out of a relationship..so of course I'm back on my Lion Boy SHIT! I'm looking for a bitch I can dump dis dick off in ya know trying to get my lap wet with a few lonely raindrops...my car was out of commission so I couldn't roam the jungles of Atlanta like I wanted to...sooooo I go to this old ass website ( yes a website...real players know...when youre not mobile you hit them internet streets and Google the pussy)..TAGGED.COM! Yall know that website was the shit in high school, IDK why I went on this specific website but I did...so I see this Jamaican chick with this bad ass body....no lie shawty was like Keish from belly...had me like 0_0......so I hit her with go to Niketalk Myspace line "can I borrow you" lmaoooooooo yall know that shit worked like a charm..I got the digits and everything...I hit shawty up ASAP...we chop it up....of course I invite her over the next day...

THE CRIB

So Shawty catch the bus to my house....she get off and she got on these damn black leggings walking all stank and bowlegged ...thighs and ass flying ehwhere..I swear to god...In my mind I'm like..."God You know im bout to TEAR THIS CURRY CHICKEN ASS UP!!!!!!! GIVE ME THE STRENGTH OF 1000000 GOLIATHS...I SWEAR IM FUCK THE RASTA OUT THIS HOE", we make it back to my crib and I put a movie on and shit....I forget what it was, I mean I wasnt paying attention no way...hell she didnt even sit down on the couch, she put all of that hamhock ass in my lap....my face is like this -----> ^_^ lmao...yall got to understand...I was in a slump after My ex and I had broke up...I wasnt chasing any YAMPS just chilling and being miserable..so of course I wasnt getting any pussy...my dick was dry as them hoes asses who don't put lotion on their butt crack during the winter...hoe ass crack be so dry she gotta get a metal foot scrubber to get the dirty ashy ass flakes off her butt...but yeah...I was horny as hell...and my dick was ready to put that broads walls into ICU( INTENSIVE COOCHIE UNIT)...so I say fuck this movie lets go to my room...she like cool...hell before I got to the room that broad was giving me the sloppiest blow occupation I ever had dawg....spit flying ehwhere...I mean this yamp was good...look if I had been uncircumcised she would sucked the extra meat off and it would've been a pleasant circumcision...so after like 10 minutes...I'm like strip..I'm ready to pound her....I'm looking like a LION BOY...I done stripped ass naked...just so my clothes wouldnt hinder my agile speed and power in my stroke...I tie my hair back AKA MY LION BOY MANE.....and I'm ready to FUCK!....So she strips naked and say "Fuck me from the back"...I'm like "bitch what you think I was going to do in the first place ? fuck you face to face ?" ...So she turns over and get into that real doggy style position...FELLAS YALL KNOW WHAT IM SAYING!!!!!!!! Face down Pussy and ass up type shit...not like how them ol weak ass hoes be...you know putting that hump in they back being scary...bitches be in the Quasimodo position looking like retards...tombout doggy style...yeah right scab...you look like you got scoliosis...bitch is yo spine crooked ? Assume the damn position then you got damn hunchback. But yeah so she's ready...I put that magnum on...and its on...

WHAT IN DA DAMN HELL

I'm thinking I'm about to slide this crooked pussy burglar inside this hoe with ease...yeahhhhh righttttttttt!!!!!!!!! I got maybe half of my head in, and she started running up the damn headboard...I'm like what the hell is wrong...shes like "NO THAT SHIT HURTS LIKE HELL...WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOUR DICK?"...I'm like whats wrong with your pussy ? She like "No something is really wrong with your dick...its too big for me...and is it curves..no..we cant do this" I'm like...Mi dick is not to big...your pussy is too small dammit......so she says holup...give her a few minutes...I'm like cool....so I'm laying in my bed ass naked...looking at my dick go from super erect....to flaccid as fuck....5 minutes pass by...10 minutes pass by...15 minutes pass by..20 minutes pass by...I'm raging mad...so I say...

HEY...GET THE FUCK UP...AND GET THE FUCK OUT...FUCK YOU THINK THIS IS A REST STOP FOR COOCHIE ? A FUCKING SHELTERED FOR BATTERED AND ABUSED UTERUS..YOU DONE LOST YOUR MIND TRYING ME LIKE A FUCKING LAME..GETCHO BLACK ASS OUT OF MY HOUSE...AND I BETTER NO EVER SEE YA ASS ON THIS STREET AGAIN....GOOD LUCK WALKING DOWN THE STREET BY YOURSELF HOE..BEEF PATTY ASS BITCH!

Yeah I know I was harsh....but damn yall...I was just coming out of a very emotional relationship...I wanted some pussy and I wanted right then and there...ya know...I actually seen shawty last year on the bus...she couldn't even look me in the eye lmao

The moral of this story is...well... don't be so tighten up

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

RIP CHRIS THOMPSON AKA @CHRISIN2D The Guy I never Met




Today I woke up, showered, brushed my teeth and put on my work clothes just like everyone else did, I wasn't expected much from this day, hell I wanted this day to go by fast as possible so I could be with my family on Thursday. I wasn't even planning on logging on twitter to be honest, don't know why but I wasn't...I did anyway and unfortunately I had to find out about losing a close follower, NT fam Chris Thompson better known as @ChrisIn2D on twitter...never in million years if someone would have told me that I would care and be hurt about a guy I never met, you know that's just how I function...I separate my feelings from people I don't know...but with Chris of course it was different, been knowing the guy since 09 and since then Him and I have had a lot of conversations on life....shared a lot of things in common. I guess when you can connect with people on that level you don't have to see them in the physical form to know they're good people, or friend worthy...I was at work when Amp broke the news, I was shocked at how hard it hit me...I just went to the bathroom and just sat there until my shift was over...because I couldn't believe it....I'm no stranger to death, I experience it yearly with my childhood friends...I tell people all the time when subject of "Death" comes up that I should have been dead a minute ago, just off the strength of what my past is....but you know every time it comes around its like a new experience to me...I guess its because I'm 22 and everyone around me is the same age also...it just doesn't seem right for us to die at this age, what have we accomplished at 20, 21, 22 ?I guess its just the things I know the ones we lost like Chris wont have the chance to experience...Kids, meeting that special woman, getting old and watching your kids have kids... that's what hurts the most...I'm not going to turn this into a novel tho...

SO......RIP Chris...sad to know you and I will never have a conversation again, and I'm sorry I couldn't make it down to Florida in time and chop it up with you like we planned for so long....RIP...its love



Also AMP hold your head.

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

THAT ONE TIME IN 6TH GRADE

First off...Yall hoes better stop rushing me and my damn stories before somebody get they damn uterus slept in by a big crooked ass cock!...

Secondaly shoutout to Paul D. West Middle School...Off in that East Point, whats hannin cuh cuh...folk folk...whats hannin lil Poont Rock...lil Pickle Head...lil Jug Mouth...lil Toe nail clipper...yeah whats hannin!

OK I dont know what the hell I was talking about in that sentence above this, I dont even know who I was shouting out, but yeah lets get on with this story yall lol!

HISTORY!
Ok this story is about this fuck boi Joshua Smith and the fight we had in Ms. Shan homeroom class at paul d. west, but before I get into all that lets do a background check on this hoe nigga. Now Josh and I go back to elementary, Conley Hills elementary to be exact...this guy was the biggest weakest kid in school..fucking care bear ass nigga...straight up, bruh couldve been "Bitch Bear" if you touched this bum he would start crying like a hoe on her period that left her tampons..now she gotta be all bloody for a whole damn week, because her stupid ass went on a camping trip, but yeah back to the fuck boi matter at hand, dude was heart was fucking flaccid, church going, band geek drumline hoe nigga...shawty was soft as freshly made Easter peeps...history lesson done.

Interlude
Now look I always been skinny, always...but listen here BITCH! My dick been big, and been crooked and ready fuck since the age of four...Now I know yall like what does this have to do with the story Keith...Shut up cunt slabs and let me tell you. I was born with all these weapons for the hoes because my Father KEITH CHANDLER SR! WAS A FUCKING THOROUGH ASS NIGGA...meaning bitch blood dont pump here...he took up boxing since he was a kid...so of course he taught me how to square up and bless niggas with THAWHAW power and anger. That means dont try me..I will knock you the hell out, then occupy your hoe, mother, sister, aunts, hell even ya dead grandma uterus and make them hoes come alive again. My point is when it comes to actually throwing hands, size dont matter...but brains do...let the story begin.

Homeroom Open Chest

So its 8am class havent started yet, teacher aint made it in yet with her fat stank breath, wet armpit having ass, but yeah we in this classroom horsing around and shit like young gangstas do! So my Patna dem toine suggest we play open chest, I'm like hell yeah nigga lets go ain no fuck boi lets play. So I'm walk around class with my chest covered and shit looking for a fool to punch and I see this bum nigga josh slipping...I hit that nigga like 4 times in his power ranger puddy ass chest, I knew that nigga was hurt lol...I caught him off guard and shit..pie ass clown shouldve had his eyes open, now my chest is covered so the rules are you cant hit a person if their chest is covered by their arms..........WELL this asshole hauls off and hits me in the jaw lmaooooooo man I had braids back then too, but on this day I had an afro out..man this nigga knocked the 60's and the 70's out my ass.....I swear to go every got damn thing slowed down in an instant..bruh I had a got damn epiphany..I had a whole damn conversation with myself..it went like this...

Keith: Shawty that care bear ass nigga just rocked you
Keef: Yeah I know dumb ass...I can feel the blood in my mouth
Keith: You know the whole classroom is watching right ? All da hoez just saw you get bombed
Keef: Nigga I know that shit already can you say something useful..some shit thats going to help me in this situation smart ass
Keith: Sure...that big ass nigga just cocked his fist back again, he's about to hit you..

I see this faggot is about to hit me again with his slow swinging ass..but I push him back to break the swing....I blacked out after that I was so fucking angry....I started to punish thiat oversized slow fuck... eventually I punch his up against a wall, this bastard had no where to go..but then the oddest thing happened...it was like he gave up..like he knew hew was getting thrashed..so what he did was he expose himself to my fist and walked to a desk (note I'm still fighting this idiot, I'm literally right behind him following him punching him in the head) this lil bitch sits down on his pussy at the desk...and covers his head....did you think that stopped me from beating his ass? NO....I STOOD RIGHT FUCKING THERE AND POUNDED ON HIS FUCKING HEAD WITH THAWHAWS FOR MINUTES..UNTIL MY FUCKING HANDS WERE BUSTED. Everyone in the class knew the fight was over...matter of fact they thought it was out of hand....I dont know who came and got me off that bitch, but I ended up in my seat...surrounded by 3 other kids until Ms. Shan hungry hippo looking ass came back in the room.

So Ms. Shan comes in the room, and everyone runs back to their seats.....I'm calm...shit I feel good, I done whooped this ol good guy looking nigga ass and I got away with it...I git the most devilish grin on my face...because this big ass cow in front of the classroom dont know what happen. WELP!!!!!!!!!! That shit didnt last long...guess what dumb ass get up in the middle of homeroom announcements and comes to my desk..GUESS WHO...JUST GUESS!!!!.....This dickhead Josh...This bitch nigga in front of me crying and shit with blood and boogers sliding down his face...looking like one of them snitching faggots on the first 48...FUCK IT DEN! I jump up...I'm like MOTHAFUCKA!!!! I swing on him lol...but the shit was broken up before it could even start again. I got in trouble...assholes gave me 5 days suspension..my mom found out I was barely passing and made me cut my hair and shit -_______________- had ehbody calling me PEANUT HEAD KEEF!..Yeah I won, but I still took an L.
So yeah the morale of this story is...if you one of these drumline band geek, bible carrying assholes....DONT TRY ME WITH THE FUCKBOISM, you not getting any strikes off me bitch...I'm not the pope, I'm not the pastor, bitch I damn sure aint a priest because I dont like lil boys, and bitch I sure as hell aint a monk because I love pussy and xbox too much....bitch I'll baptize you in fist of fucking thawhaw fury...stay in your place

Saturday, October 22, 2011

FAMILY FEUD!

Ok yeah I have been gone from this blog for a long time, but I'm back now and I promise I will update more often...but yeah back to business bitches!

The Family Fued!

So yeah man yall know how it is in the hood, your punk ass walking down street one day and BOOM! A fuck boi run up on you with them THAWHAWS now you on the ground bleeding like a lil hoe...crying because you got ya weak ass knocked out... because you thought this was Mr. Rogers neighborhood..pussy nigga your head was in the clouds and you was chewing bubblicious like a faggot, and some random GoonAHolic splatted yo pussy ass to the concrete...yeah! Ok let me stop its not like that, but this story I'm about to tell you is some what simliar...I'm lying my ass this story dont got shit to do with that little scenario I just nutted in yall brain..but here we go.

She Bust Her Ass
So its a normal day out here in CreekSide Apartments I'm walking around the hood and what do you know....I stumble upon two scab hoes arguing of some shit that doesnt matter...one of the girls was name Maddy...she was so fucking bald headed man...and skinny with these cigarette burn mark spots running up here legs...hoe had the nerve to wear some daisy dukes that day...Bitch was looking like a cheap ass metro phone wrapped in one of them cheap ass designer phone cases. The other scab was this broad name Shy...man her skin was so fucking black and crunchy...good god she was ugly..this hoe fingers and mouth was always red from eating flaming hot cheetos...bitch looked like Mr. Popo with red lipstick on...I mean this broad looked like Wanda from in loving color.
These two abominations are sitting up here arguing lol, I'm instigating my ass off of course because thats what a young CapoSaures do! But yeah so the black dirt bag shy is popping off on that rancid Maddy broad, and all of a sudden this dumb ass BIH Shy slips and fall in some mud..I mean she was already 3rd world country black, but now she was looking like a doodoo baby. Maddy and I was dying laughing straight up...Shy was so hurt, she looked like a lost puppy for a quick second. So Shy gets mad of course and like all females do when they are mad, she set a bitch calling record on Maddy ass...I never heard that many variations of the word bitch! For real people ain lyin ain lyin " Bald headed bitch, green pussy bitch, yo mama a hoe bitch, section8 bitch!", people as we say today...Shit was getting REAL!!!!...

Welp Shy cussed Maddy ass out all the way to here apartment..ya know these 2 dumb infected hoes stayed in the same apartment building from each other...yeah I know right...stupid! So they arguing and shit and by this time the parents and siblings come outside, now I'm thinking these 2 welfare families are going to work it out...yeah aight....nooooooooooo the mamas get to fighting..old rocking chair titties flying eh where and shit..it was crazy...you got Maddy fighting Shy..titties eh where...Shy brother Jimmy done jumped in and start whooping on Maddys mama (Shy Mama stopped fighting and just watched lol)...eldery getting they ass whooped eh where, Shy Deaf brother Tony fighting Maddy's older sister..another bald headed bitch getting her ass whooped eh where...I think her name was Gloria...I cant remember, but she was a bald headed black bitch too..matter of fact all them hoes bald headed and black...but yeah shy was dragging Maddy ass across the concrete by that lil thin ass Ponetail she called a pony tail...Jimmy was putting the thahaws on Maddy mama..she really was getting that ass beat...every time she swung at Jimmy one of them fanny pack xerox tits popped out, then she would fall....it was like watching King Kong fight those fighter pilots on top of the building only to fall to his death..that bitch fell to her death at least 4 times....Some how in the hoodrat battle royal Gloria gets a chain..a bicycle chain lmaoooooo...and starts beating Tony over the head with it...deaf retards getting they ass whooped eh where!!!...this guy Tony cant speak so when he yells it sounds like "BAW BAW BAW GABA GABA BA BA BA" yeah I was dying laughing as I typed that...but yeah she was doing shawty with the chain, until Shy jumped in and and pulled all of that bald headed hoe sides off...ain lyin..bitch was looking like a poor ass bob the builder after that shit. Someone called the cops well after a good 5 minutes of seeing this PPV type fight they call the cops...cops show up...and arrest all they black ass....hell ain even know the cops brought that many handcuffs lol.
The lesson here is...if you black, bald head and on section 8....dont slip up in the mud, because you just might fight an army of mafuckas.