GAT DAMN BARNEY STORY

OK so we all remember the hit tv show Barney right ? Don't front either mothafucka because we all know in pre-school that was our shit. Well I'm going to tell you a story about this son of a bitch barney the dinosaur ( he was a dinosaur right ?)

My little scholars Christian academy was the scene of this catastrophe. I hated this gat damn school...they use to whoop our ass with drum sticks and shit ( that's another story ill tell yall about) but yeah tho back to story...so it was one of the kids birthday party, i cant recall the name ion know think the damn girl name was Amber Grace(damn girl looked like a fraggle rock) some country shit like that ion know shit.....but yeah though so its the end of the day and we having the birthday party you know just having fun, so Mrs. Lee ( this big ass cow-a-saurus was every bit of 5'11 with an old outdated french roll and a chin strap beard thicker than ricky rawseeeeeee himself) directed us to the eating area( shit was a damn kitchen stupid ass school wasn't shit but a shotgun house smh) so we sitting down and they bring in the cake, but before they cut the damn cake they tell us to close our eyes, talking about a fucking surprise and shit....so of course we do close our eyes....and 5 seconds later we open them and ALL HELL BREAKS LOOSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ITS A FUCKING GIGANTIC PURPLE DINOSAUR IN THE FUCKING KITCHEN!!!!!!!!! It was like a chain reaction of how the kids reacted....some were crying and I'm not talking about regular crying I'm talking about the kind where they yell and take a deep breath to yell some more.....others broke out running, some hid under tables, ME well I stood there in shock hell.....this fucker Barney is sitting there singing pedo shit like " I love you" on tv it sounded like a jolly voice in person it sounded like some possessed demon with a deep voice.....that fool Barney had the nerves to pick up one of the babies that damn baby was clawing that nigga like a damn wolverine badger combo.............THE WORST DAY OF MY TODDLER LIFE, well that's if i exclude the episode where my moms dragged me to see the Easter bunny.

END!