RIP CHRIS THOMPSON AKA @CHRISIN2D The Guy I never Met

Today I woke up, showered, brushed my teeth and put on my work clothes just like everyone else did, I wasn't expected much from this day, hell I wanted this day to go by fast as possible so I could be with my family on Thursday. I wasn't even planning on logging on twitter to be honest, don't know why but I wasn't...I did anyway and unfortunately I had to find out about losing a close follower, NT fam Chris Thompson better known as @ChrisIn2D on twitter...never in million years if someone would have told me that I would care and be hurt about a guy I never met, you know that's just how I function...I separate my feelings from people I don't know...but with Chris of course it was different, been knowing the guy since 09 and since then Him and I have had a lot of conversations on life....shared a lot of things in common. I guess when you can connect with people on that level you don't have to see them in the physical form to know they're good people, or friend worthy...I was at work when Amp broke the news, I was shocked at how hard it hit me...I just went to the bathroom and just sat there until my shift was over...because I couldn't believe it....I'm no stranger to death, I experience it yearly with my childhood friends...I tell people all the time when subject of "Death" comes up that I should have been dead a minute ago, just off the strength of what my past is....but you know every time it comes around its like a new experience to me...I guess its because I'm 22 and everyone around me is the same age also...it just doesn't seem right for us to die at this age, what have we accomplished at 20, 21, 22 ?I guess its just the things I know the ones we lost like Chris wont have the chance to experience...Kids, meeting that special woman, getting old and watching your kids have kids... that's what hurts the most...I'm not going to turn this into a novel tho...

SO......RIP Chris...sad to know you and I will never have a conversation again, and I'm sorry I couldn't make it down to Florida in time and chop it up with you like we planned for so long....RIP...its love

Also AMP hold your head.

THAT ONE TIME IN 6TH GRADE

First off...Yall hoes better stop rushing me and my damn stories before somebody get they damn uterus slept in by a big crooked ass cock!...

Secondaly shoutout to Paul D. West Middle School...Off in that East Point, whats hannin cuh cuh...folk folk...whats hannin lil Poont Rock...lil Pickle Head...lil Jug Mouth...lil Toe nail clipper...yeah whats hannin!

OK I dont know what the hell I was talking about in that sentence above this, I dont even know who I was shouting out, but yeah lets get on with this story yall lol!

HISTORY!

Ok this story is about this fuck boi Joshua Smith and the fight we had in Ms. Shan homeroom class at paul d. west, but before I get into all that lets do a background check on this hoe nigga. Now Josh and I go back to elementary, Conley Hills elementary to be exact...this guy was the biggest weakest kid in school..fucking care bear ass nigga...straight up, bruh couldve been "Bitch Bear" if you touched this bum he would start crying like a hoe on her period that left her tampons..now she gotta be all bloody for a whole damn week, because her stupid ass went on a camping trip, but yeah back to the fuck boi matter at hand, dude was heart was fucking flaccid, church going, band geek drumline hoe nigga...shawty was soft as freshly made Easter peeps...history lesson done.

Interlude

Now look I always been skinny, always...but listen here BITCH! My dick been big, and been crooked and ready fuck since the age of four...Now I know yall like what does this have to do with the story Keith...Shut up cunt slabs and let me tell you. I was born with all these weapons for the hoes because my Father KEITH CHANDLER SR! WAS A FUCKING THOROUGH ASS NIGGA...meaning bitch blood dont pump here...he took up boxing since he was a kid...so of course he taught me how to square up and bless niggas with THAWHAW power and anger. That means dont try me..I will knock you the hell out, then occupy your hoe, mother, sister, aunts, hell even ya dead grandma uterus and make them hoes come alive again. My point is when it comes to actually throwing hands, size dont matter...but brains do...let the story begin.

Homeroom Open Chest

So its 8am class havent started yet, teacher aint made it in yet with her fat stank breath, wet armpit having ass, but yeah we in this classroom horsing around and shit like young gangstas do! So my Patna dem toine suggest we play open chest, I'm like hell yeah nigga lets go ain no fuck boi lets play. So I'm walk around class with my chest covered and shit looking for a fool to punch and I see this bum nigga josh slipping...I hit that nigga like 4 times in his power ranger puddy ass chest, I knew that nigga was hurt lol...I caught him off guard and shit..pie ass clown shouldve had his eyes open, now my chest is covered so the rules are you cant hit a person if their chest is covered by their arms..........WELL this asshole hauls off and hits me in the jaw lmaooooooo man I had braids back then too, but on this day I had an afro out..man this nigga knocked the 60's and the 70's out my ass.....I swear to go every got damn thing slowed down in an instant..bruh I had a got damn epiphany..I had a whole damn conversation with myself..it went like this...

Keith: Shawty that care bear ass nigga just rocked you

Keef: Yeah I know dumb ass...I can feel the blood in my mouth

Keith: You know the whole classroom is watching right ? All da hoez just saw you get bombed

Keef: Nigga I know that shit already can you say something useful..some shit thats going to help me in this situation smart ass

Keith: Sure...that big ass nigga just cocked his fist back again, he's about to hit you..

I see this faggot is about to hit me again with his slow swinging ass..but I push him back to break the swing....I blacked out after that I was so fucking angry....I started to punish thiat oversized slow fuck... eventually I punch his up against a wall, this bastard had no where to go..but then the oddest thing happened...it was like he gave up..like he knew hew was getting thrashed..so what he did was he expose himself to my fist and walked to a desk (note I'm still fighting this idiot, I'm literally right behind him following him punching him in the head) this lil bitch sits down on his pussy at the desk...and covers his head....did you think that stopped me from beating his ass? NO....I STOOD RIGHT FUCKING THERE AND POUNDED ON HIS FUCKING HEAD WITH THAWHAWS FOR MINUTES..UNTIL MY FUCKING HANDS WERE BUSTED. Everyone in the class knew the fight was over...matter of fact they thought it was out of hand....I dont know who came and got me off that bitch, but I ended up in my seat...surrounded by 3 other kids until Ms. Shan hungry hippo looking ass came back in the room.

So Ms. Shan comes in the room, and everyone runs back to their seats.....I'm calm...shit I feel good, I done whooped this ol good guy looking nigga ass and I got away with it...I git the most devilish grin on my face...because this big ass cow in front of the classroom dont know what happen. WELP!!!!!!!!!! That shit didnt last long...guess what dumb ass get up in the middle of homeroom announcements and comes to my desk..GUESS WHO...JUST GUESS!!!!.....This dickhead Josh...This bitch nigga in front of me crying and shit with blood and boogers sliding down his face...looking like one of them snitching faggots on the first 48...FUCK IT DEN! I jump up...I'm like MOTHAFUCKA!!!! I swing on him lol...but the shit was broken up before it could even start again. I got in trouble...assholes gave me 5 days suspension..my mom found out I was barely passing and made me cut my hair and shit -_______________- had ehbody calling me PEANUT HEAD KEEF!..Yeah I won, but I still took an L.

So yeah the morale of this story is...if you one of these drumline band geek, bible carrying assholes....DONT TRY ME WITH THE FUCKBOISM, you not getting any strikes off me bitch...I'm not the pope, I'm not the pastor, bitch I damn sure aint a priest because I dont like lil boys, and bitch I sure as hell aint a monk because I love pussy and xbox too much....bitch I'll baptize you in fist of fucking thawhaw fury...stay in your place

FAMILY FEUD!

Ok yeah I have been gone from this blog for a long time, but I'm back now and I promise I will update more often...but yeah back to business bitches!

The Family Fued!

So yeah man yall know how it is in the hood, your punk ass walking down street one day and BOOM! A fuck boi run up on you with them THAWHAWS now you on the ground bleeding like a lil hoe...crying because you got ya weak ass knocked out... because you thought this was Mr. Rogers neighborhood..pussy nigga your head was in the clouds and you was chewing bubblicious like a faggot, and some random GoonAHolic splatted yo pussy ass to the concrete...yeah! Ok let me stop its not like that, but this story I'm about to tell you is some what simliar...I'm lying my ass this story dont got shit to do with that little scenario I just nutted in yall brain..but here we go.

She Bust Her Ass

So its a normal day out here in CreekSide Apartments I'm walking around the hood and what do you know....I stumble upon two scab hoes arguing of some shit that doesnt matter...one of the girls was name Maddy...she was so fucking bald headed man...and skinny with these cigarette burn mark spots running up here legs...hoe had the nerve to wear some daisy dukes that day...Bitch was looking like a cheap ass metro phone wrapped in one of them cheap ass designer phone cases. The other scab was this broad name Shy...man her skin was so fucking black and crunchy...good god she was ugly..this hoe fingers and mouth was always red from eating flaming hot cheetos...bitch looked like Mr. Popo with red lipstick on...I mean this broad looked like Wanda from in loving color.

These two abominations are sitting up here arguing lol, I'm instigating my ass off of course because thats what a young CapoSaures do! But yeah so the black dirt bag shy is popping off on that rancid Maddy broad, and all of a sudden this dumb ass BIH Shy slips and fall in some mud..I mean she was already 3rd world country black, but now she was looking like a doodoo baby. Maddy and I was dying laughing straight up...Shy was so hurt, she looked like a lost puppy for a quick second. So Shy gets mad of course and like all females do when they are mad, she set a bitch calling record on Maddy ass...I never heard that many variations of the word bitch! For real people ain lyin ain lyin " Bald headed bitch, green pussy bitch, yo mama a hoe bitch, section8 bitch!", people as we say today...Shit was getting REAL!!!!...

Welp Shy cussed Maddy ass out all the way to here apartment..ya know these 2 dumb infected hoes stayed in the same apartment building from each other...yeah I know right...stupid! So they arguing and shit and by this time the parents and siblings come outside, now I'm thinking these 2 welfare families are going to work it out...yeah aight....nooooooooooo the mamas get to fighting..old rocking chair titties flying eh where and shit..it was crazy...you got Maddy fighting Shy..titties eh where...Shy brother Jimmy done jumped in and start whooping on Maddys mama (Shy Mama stopped fighting and just watched lol)...eldery getting they ass whooped eh where, Shy Deaf brother Tony fighting Maddy's older sister..another bald headed bitch getting her ass whooped eh where...I think her name was Gloria...I cant remember, but she was a bald headed black bitch too..matter of fact all them hoes bald headed and black...but yeah shy was dragging Maddy ass across the concrete by that lil thin ass Ponetail she called a pony tail...Jimmy was putting the thahaws on Maddy mama..she really was getting that ass beat...every time she swung at Jimmy one of them fanny pack xerox tits popped out, then she would fall....it was like watching King Kong fight those fighter pilots on top of the building only to fall to his death..that bitch fell to her death at least 4 times....Some how in the hoodrat battle royal Gloria gets a chain..a bicycle chain lmaoooooo...and starts beating Tony over the head with it...deaf retards getting they ass whooped eh where!!!...this guy Tony cant speak so when he yells it sounds like "BAW BAW BAW GABA GABA BA BA BA" yeah I was dying laughing as I typed that...but yeah she was doing shawty with the chain, until Shy jumped in and and pulled all of that bald headed hoe sides off...ain lyin..bitch was looking like a poor ass bob the builder after that shit. Someone called the cops well after a good 5 minutes of seeing this PPV type fight they call the cops...cops show up...and arrest all they black ass....hell ain even know the cops brought that many handcuffs lol.

The lesson here is...if you black, bald head and on section 8....dont slip up in the mud, because you just might fight an army of mafuckas.

Sweet Jones Scripture: #2 Beat Em

Yeah Sweet just got his haircut and shit and he feels like putting you unblessed niggas on game this Sunday...Today Sweet will tell you how to make these hoes be all they can be...you dig me playa. Pay attention and learn some pimp shit on how to beat these hoes asses.

1. Keep that back hand ready at all times you never know when a bitch might roll her eyes, as soon as she do you roll your fucking hand across that bitches mouth.

2. If a bitch smack her lips....you grab both lips with one hand.... Jackie Chan chop that hoe in the mouth with the other hand, and if she keep smacking her damn lips grab the bitches nose and mouth till she turn blue.

3. Never and sweet means never hit your lightskin hoes in the face...bitches will look like papa smurf if you do....get a timbo boot and step on the hoe feet.

4. Back talk, let the hoe talk...take her for a ride to the countriest middle of no where piece of shit land you can find...leave the hoe...make her walk...and she better walk the whole damn way too

5. Last but not least....drastic times calls for drastic measures...bitch aint making no money, bitch dont want to listen, bitch talking back, bitch trying to be the boss....BEAT THAT FUCKING HOE ASS WITH BUNDLE OF CLOTHES HANGERS....it works, never fails.

Sweet Jones Scripture:Entry # 1 The introduction of Sweet Jones

Now I know some of you niggas, hoes, bitches is like who is Sweet Jones, well let Sweet Tell you who he is...Sweet aint a regular nigga...NAW NOT EVEN HOE...see Sweet is a rare breed of pimpin blessed nigga. You see when Sweet Jones was teleported out of the virgin Marry womb(YEAH BITCH TELEPORTED SWEET AINT WANT THAT PUSSY SLIME ON HIS NEW BABY SKIN), bitches got on they knees and kissed Sweet Jones baby penis crowning him the greatest of all time when it came to this pimp shit bitch. From that day forward sweet didn't do regular thangs NAW NOT EVEN HOE..you see when Sweet drink his orange juice that fucking orange is fresh and ain tombout grocery store fresh NAW NOT EVEN HOE that fucking orange was grew from the ground that morning specifically for Sweet Jones...you see bitch mother nature is one of Sweet Jones bitches, thats why Sweet Jones hoes don't have periods or cramps Naw NOT EVEN HOE they pussy stay smelling like the finest of new born baby pussy. Sweet don't fucking drive either NAW NOT EVEN HOE Sweet get picked up by every toe on his feet by 30 doves and is flew to his destination...And sweet Jones definitely don't talk when he mad Naw not fucking even hoe...Sweet Jones bitches know to use sign language when Sweet ears don't want to hear that shit....Sweet jones get his nails and toe nails cleaned and cut every week and his hoes keep them clippings...because sweet jones finger and toe nails are made out of gold and platinum..know what um tombout bitch! Sweet Hair is washed in the finest of pussy oils, sweet clothes are made from the finest of slave children, sweet bitches don't watch tv or sleep in his room..Sweet bitches sleep on cots in the fucking kitchen where they belong, and hoes don't throw away Sweet Jones condoms NAW NOT EVEN HOE...they use Sweet Jones blessed golden nuts as toothpaste.

Now that you know a little bit about Sweet Jones and how extravagant he is...Sweet will be teaching sorry ass foolish hoes and niggas the fucking game...so be prepared to learn naw you wont ever be Sweet Jones NAW NOT EVEN HOE because hes perfect...but sweet will help limit your sorry ass human pathetic mistakes...and don't question Sweet Jones NAW NOT EVEN HOE Sweet Jones is 20000000000000000 years old so bitch um smarter than you...and sweet is out like that bitch CHURCH HOL UP.

What the Deuce ?

Ok people, we all know back in school how taking a shit was a no go...like it was something you just didn't do, the embarrassment of getting caught was terrifying. We use to throw wet toilet paper on niggas who was taking a shit, and we knew who you was by your sneakers so there wasn't any of that lying tombout it wasn't you...me personally I use to take my shoes off and turn them backwards that way it look like I was taking a piss rather than a shit.....it worked lol. Yeah I'm going to go down a list of some of the funniest weirdest shit I have seen in a school bathroom.

The Sink

So Paul d. west, 6 grade, Ms. shan class, bathroom break.......before I even make it the bathroom the hallway is smelling like fecal juice....like my nose was Harlem shaking all over the place...but still I had to pee so I didn't care. So I walk in the bathroom, but as soon as I walk in everyone is running out laughing...so I'm like what the fuck is so funny, I walk in get smack with scent of a stripper booty clapping with fresh shit in her ass.....THE SHIT WAS RIGHT ON THE SINK...and it just wasnt all in the sink it was in a neat spot curled up on the sink...like this nigga just got his ass on the sink and had an elegant shit....bruh shitted a perfect sand castle on the sink....I died laughing that day lol

Mr. Shaw

This guy was the principal of an elementary school I went to, this guy was a fucking weirdo white dude....any who...I'm going to the bathroom to take a piss and blow my nose. So I take the piss and now I'm going from stall to stall looking for tissue..I get to the last stall...the door is wide open...this dude Mr.shaw is in the stall damn near butt ass naked taking a shit.....I got the hell outta there quick

Basketball game

I played basketball for Elkins Pointe middle school...we had a road game at that shitty ass school...we had about 30 minutes till game time...of course I had to shit...so I tell the captain I gotta shit....he look at me like..."Cuz (LA nigga we called jew) I been had the shit since we got off the bus"...so I'm like "fuck it we got 30 minutes I'm bout go drop these thangs" he like fuck it lets go....somehow the whole team ended up going to the bathroom figures...you tell one person you gotta shit, and everyone else got to shit or piss..or do both...so we get in this bathroom and it doesnt have a roof lmaoooooooooo the fucking bathroom was a droptop convertible Im in this bitch laughing loud as hell bruh....some of the toilets or as I would say commodes were broke...like no lie they was broke into pieces lmaooo how the fuck your toilets leaning on the floor...but still I had to shit of course I couldn't sit down because the toilet was broke..so I just stretch out my hands till they touch both walls and stood up and took a shit

It's Rocks

1999, creekside apartments....we out here running around throwing rocks at each other (the hell you expect its the ghetto) on a hot summer day...now the rocks we were throwing were actually pieces of the parking lot..my cousin Jo is throwing white rocks,unlike everyone else who rocks are black...so I'm like where is he getting these white rocks from...I start looking on the ground, when I realized this nigga was throwing dried up dog shit at people...so I just Yell out "AYE THIS NIGGA THROWING DOG SHIT"...I swear everyone stopped what they was doing lol...this nigga Jo is like "Its not doodoo its rocks" lmao and continues to throws dog shit at people...I ran in the house like a hoe, ain getting hit by dog shit man

Whats that on your back ?

Paul D west once again 6 grade...we had just got in from PE so we changing out our clothes and shit, when we get done we sit in the gym till the buses come...of course this was a friday, and like always Friday=crazy shit. So I'm chilling paying pokemon yellow like bosses do and shit, the buses get called and you know its a scramble to get out of the gym, but before I just ran up out the gym I noticed something smelled like dog shit....so I'm searching, I need to know where this dog shit is located at so I wont step in this dog shit...man I get down the bleachers and I see Ashley Uglass with dog shit all up and down her back, like someone just grabbed a dog ass and scrubbed it up and down her back...I told every damn body just how like Ezell told everybody that smokey was taking a shit.."AYE EVERYBODY, ASHLEY GOT DOG SHIT ALL ON HER BACK" LMAOO we all was in there dying laughing...Ashley standing there jumping up and down crying...smell like dog shit and white folks hair.

Coach Coen

Ok I hate to bring this one up since coach Coen is dead, but damn this its short it wont do any harm...Roswell high was well a white high school...it was cool tho them white folks showed love, I was in the 9th grade so that meant coach Coen was the prince/football coach ...dude stayed giving me iss lol, but on this particular day I guess he gave the wrong student iss...This student prolly did the most vile shit I have ever seen lol...mothafucka took a shit...went outside the bathroom and wrote "FUCK COACH COEN" in shit...oh it was a female by the way

Wheels on the Bus Go Round and Round

Yeah I'm back in this thang maneeeeeeeeee I havent told a story in about 3 months been going through some bullshit cuh!!!!! BUT!!!!!!!!! I'M BACK AND I GOT A GOOD STORY FOR YOU HOES...
PDW
6 grade, young nigga attended Paul D. West Middle School....yeahhhhhhhh!!!!!! zone 3!!!!!!! but yeah tho PDW was the shit man, the school had 4 floors no lie bruh you could have a young wench, a young bitch, a young hoe, and a young skank all on different floors and no one will ever know at least them hoes wouldn't....but yeah this school was wild as hell, I swear a fight broke out everyday, shawty no lie, there was a food fight everyday(some dumb ass made the cafeteria 2 floors so you had up stairs and down stairs lunchrooms, the niggas up stairs use to throw their food over the balcony hitting whoever was in the lunch lines lmfao) you could imagine the chaos and fine hoes this school had.

The End of the Day

Now yall know how it is on a Friday getting out of school, shit its CRUNK AS HELL FOR NO REASON BRUH....WHY IN THE FUCK ARE WE SO CRUNK ???? WE LIVE IN THE FUCKING SHITTIEST PROJECTS WE ARE GO HOME TO A DUMP, BUT WE MORE HYPER THAN A STARVING AFRICAN EATING SPIT FOR DINNER I tell you that got dammit...nigga we was.. ready lulz....just thinking about all that damn noise by them buses give me a damn headache real talk lol..and we on the bus


The Bus

So yeah we on this hot ass bus I remember the day like YOU remember them dookie stains you left in your cousins drawz that you had to wear cuz you pissed on yourself the night before, and now you at home hiding them under the bottom of the dirty clothes BECAUSE YO LIL STANK 6 YEAR OLD ASS CANT DO NO FUCKING LAUNDRY MUDD BUTT WENCH!!!.....OK back to the story we on this hot ass bus, its friday, and um niggas is roastin...it was this one kid with braces(I got another story about him) man this nigga mouth was SOOOOO FUCKING BUCK RHEIUGSDGFDGSFG his name was Tony, niggas roasted his ass!!!!!!(back then niggas use to amp a joke up by saying get em) " SHAWTY BOY DONT DO IT, WIT DEM HORSE ANKLES HANGING OUT YA MOUF CUH, (get em)"...."Dont do it shawty, buck mouf ass nigga how you got fangs for ya 2 front teeth, nigga ya name aint tony its Count Buckula (get em) "NIGGA GOT 32 OG GAMEBOYS IN HIS MOUF (get em)" Of course I'm crying I mean I cant help but die laughing shit im lol right now nigga fuck you sayin hoe...bruh aint stand a chance first time riding the bus..

The Stooges

So Tony is getting his ass roasted by Rogeo (ra-geo) his brother Quentin (quin-teen) and Kenneth Porter AKA KP...now this nigga Rogeo was a freckled face mothafucka, loud ass nigga, wanted attention from hoes, but could whoop yo ass he was an 8th grader...his brother quentin was a skinny kid with a red afro light skin niggas ya know funny ass shit tho had bruh in a few of my classes so we was cool...KP was rogeo best friend all this nigga black ass nigga did was talking about eating pussy all damn day...now that I think about what mothafucka in middle school talk about eating pussy lmfao ya know ? Any way all 3 of these niggas sat in the back of the bus and when together someone was getting they ass roasted.

Armpit Shawty

So we almost at home we on Delowe Drive bout to hit Stanton rd (WHATS HANNINNNNNNNNNN ZONE 3 HOE) so I see Ashley this uglass broad who stayed in my apartments who just so happened liked me -_- but yeah shawty had on one of these redneck ass vest plaid shirts with the no sleeves, shit look like it came off a damn picnic table hosted by the Steve Austin family , but any way this hoe puts her arm up against a let down window( MIND YOU, THIS YOUNG WENCH HOE IS AT THE FRONT OF THE BUS) mannnnnnnnnnnnn I swear if odor had a color the inside of our bus would have been dog shit dookie green....the whole damn bus was FUN-K YES FUN-K not funky but FUN-K THAT'S WHEN ITS SO DAMN FUNKY, THE ODOR START PLAYING INSIDE YA NOSE HAVING FUN AND SHIT...Yall already know what was coming...this nigga Quentin Immediatlly started roasted Ashley " DAMN BITCH WTF YO ARMPIT ATE ONION RINGS ?(get em), "Rogeo this hoe stank, go change that hoe armpit diaper (get em)" " Hoe yo stank ass armpit got my afro itching (get em)" Ashley got mad as fuck, actually she got up and went to the back of that bus and started tearing Quentin a new asshole, that ghetto tramp hoe could fight..SHIIITTTT thats why I dont waste my time with uglass folks in a fight, them fools aint got nothing to lose man...so yeah she was handling that nigga....UNTIL..Rogeo gave her that one hitter...you know the one that be in the comic with a special sound effect KASMACK!!!!!! Thats what it sounded like real talk...whole bus " OHHHHHHH SHITTTTTT!!!!!" That ended that fight....but it didnt end that funk.

THE END